Saturday, April 3, 2010

Sea the Light

For a very long time, I had the idea that I was to shed a big light on darkness.
Like a flood light I would illuminate the shadow. Nothing could be concealed from me.

Where there was murkiness or shame, the hint of unspoken feelings, covert deeds, or perpetrators to be found, I’d pull out my arsenal of Mag lights, handy pointer beams, flood lights and go to work, making sure what was in the shadows, or “who” was the shadow… was visible.

It was very affective. Like a strobe triggered by movement, I could capture the beast that lurked. I would then leave behind a snap shot of the unconscious intruder, a parting reminder I had done my job, but had I?

I did this for clients because they asked for it, friends who yearned for it and then those who didn’t ask for it directly, or even want it, got the glare anyway, because I took my incandescent job like the quest of Joan of Arc.
But  something has changed. I See the Light.

I often would perceive a lighthouse as a symbol of my job of piercing darkness, but today I realized what had eluded me, the true function of a lighthouse.

A tall still structure, emanating light from a source to guide and help navigate those at sea.
It does not seek out, its fundamental nature is to illuminate.

It is up to those who "see "this light to render its meaning.

Captains who have navigated choppy waters are warned of perhaps danger ahead. Seasoned travelers understand they are close to a safe port.
Sailors know there will soon be a warm bed and hot meal. Passengers, weary of the journey will be grateful to anchor once again to the confidence of land.
It is courageous to travel on the sea.
The more one learns to steer ones own ship,understand the maps of the Gods, the better the journey on water.

Those of us who are lighthouses must stand strong and simply, light the way. Or  at least know where the darn flash light is when the lights go out!


Mike Clelland! said...

This personal journey can be intensely lonely. My ongoing experiences are so difficult to articulate - well, I articulate just fine, but there are very few people who seem interested in my "adventure" - so I end up isolated.

Whatever is happening to me, there is more going on that I can completely understand, is very real. And it really is an adventure. I feel like I am off the map, out at sea, I've stepped off the path - I'm searching, and that searching is taking place within.

Your metaphor of the ship entering the dangerous harbor is appropriate.

I am the light - I have "arsenal of Mag lights, handy pointer beams, flood light" and they are all pointed inward as I do the hard work "to shed light on darkness... illuminate the shadow." I'm looking right at my own shadow, and it's fascinating. It's not easy, but it is essential. The words in this comment might sound gloomy, but this odyssey is vital.

At the same time, I have a watchful eye out for beacons in the night.

Thank you Marla for you dedication and hard work!
Mike C!

Marla Frees said...

Thank you Mike.,....yes it can be lonely, but you MUST share with others your extraordinary experiences.....we must,.....
just burn bright.

Mike Clelland! said...


After I clicked the "publish" button and shared the comment (above) I was left feeling a little un-nerved. Like what I shared was too personal, or a total downer.

Curiously, the human emotion that seems to accompany "sharing" these experiences is simply embarrassment. Which, I guess is just a form of fear.

Others out there are experiences very similar stuff that I'm experiencing (you should see my email in-box, whew!) and I feel it's important to try to be as honest as I can be. Even if it comes off as "too personal" or "a total downer."

Mike C!