Friday, December 30, 2011

The Blessing of Ben Breedlove

There is no surprise that his name was Ben Breedlove.

I sit here in front of this imac, with tears pouring down my face, because I am consumed by the strength and the love of Spirit who gave the world a boy named Ben who was intuitive enough to share us his life and death, a boy so beautiful, so loved by his family and born to a  family called the BREEDLOVE’S for goodness sake!

I was just  introduced to him like many of you, through the news. How he had had a serious heart condition all his life, but over the last week his story and life have been the subject of hope and amazement as he recorded on YouTube his...well, his own eulogy days before he actually passed.

I am moved by the treasures of life but often numbed by my own stupid thoughts of self loathing. Disappointment that things don’t always smell like roses, that my love life has not worked out the way I fantasized, or that no matter what creams I buy or how much I exercise, I still don’t look like Cindy Crawford. The pitiful sad wounded parts of me that sometimes get activated and put me on a pity-party spiral. But today Ben changed that for me, I hope forever.

Most of you know that death is part of my job. You know through the many stories I have shared that the dead give me so many details for their loved ones so many feelings, memories and thoughts that  in my job I am graced to be able to do this for others.

You also know that there is more than skepticism about this subject. The life after death question, not to mention the judgment (understandably so) of those of  who might be accused of being ambulance chasers, taking advantage of grief and charging money to remove the curse of the grief that consumes us.

But Ben overcame all of that for me today.  

No, I am not saying that Ben came to me, as the dead often do, and wants me to track down his family to give them messages... no today BEN and HIS FAMILY have messages for me, for us and we can either feel them or not.

  I do find it very interesting that when I wanted and needed sleep, I was wakened with a blast of cold that irritated me so much that no matter how I moved the covers I could not get myself comfortable. So I  bitched, told that cat I didn’t want to get up, pulled myself out and in my mid-morning-stupor, turned to the web stories of CNN …. Doomed teen Ben Breedlove shares life after death experiences on YouTube. 

I have to do my job, I have to listen, I have to be ready and able to either give messages from loved ones, or I am blessed with having prophetic information that means nothing to me, but does or will to someone else.

We will all some day feel doomed by death, but not Ben. Ben and those he touched
 are blessed.

Thank you Ben and your loving family and Spirit, who share you with the world.

 There are so many links to this story.... just find him. Or he will find you!,,20557271,00.html

Friday, December 2, 2011

I Took My Time to Listen

I’ d had a headache for about two hours and thought, I’ll go out, get some air and a few things at the grocery store.

 I picked up some little juicy  Clementine’s, broccoli, a hunk of dark chocolate and started to walk home when I heard the way I hear things,  “ sit and have some soup.”

Ok, well sure, so I sat down outside at my little Chinese-take-out ordered a small wonton soup, downed it and thought... hum that was weird.

 But when I listen and I am called— I do.

I started to walk home and saw my friend Lina who works at my local Starbucks. We have a familiar morning relationship that centers around one shot of peppermint and Mocha for my holiday latte.

“Hey how are you?” She buoyantly asked.

“Well Lina,  I’m really sad that our Blockbuster is going out of business… I need a hug.”  We laughed, but she hugged me anyway and then it just popped in my head to ask about her girlfriend, Kit.

“ Well actually she is right over here”…She led me to the back corner of Starbucks where Kit was hunkerd down at her computer. We all three  commiserated on  how we like and dont like ordering videos on line… when Lina said, “ today is the anniversary of Kit’s mothers death.”

My headache flared. So for the next 40 minutes we talked to Jo Ann, Kit's mom. She had died from a brain aneurism. Lots of funny wonderful, interesting details that had Kits eyes wet, red and joyous that her mom knew so much about her, like she had been looking over her shoulder in preparation for our meeting. My headache stopped when Jo Ann said to her daughter, “ Be joyous...Oh, and fix your bike.”

They both hugged me and asked,” aren’t you tired?”

“ Not in the least, I’m just glad I took my time to listen.” I said.

This is how I want my holiday to be, filled with Spirit and the messages that they have for others …and me.
And that's the way it was on December 2nd 2011.